happy father’s day to the best dad I know. thanks for being awesome and raising these ridiculous children with me. we love you this this this thiiiiiissssss much.

-I can’t find the cord for my camera. This happened a few months back. I found them on amazon for ONE PENNY. I ordered one (shipping was like 4 dollars though, because of course it came from China) and bragged to Bruce about my amazing deal. His first question was “if they were only one penny, why didn’t you order like 20 of them?” -_____- I am eating those words today. Should of bought more.

-Bruce has talked about becoming a firefighter in the past. His dad just retired as one, and it’s something he thought he would enjoy but physically didn’t think he could do. Now he’s lost a lot of weight and in really good shape, he can. He decided Tuesday he was going to do it and he goes in Monday morning to take the test to get accepted into the training academy. I am so excited for him and slight nervous. I know it would be a good change, but it’s all happening so fast. Plus apparently firefighters start out making shit-fifty an hour. Who knew? So here’s to being broke and chasing dreams.

-I’m finally taking steps to get certified to do taxes. My mom and I are weirdos who loooove doing taxes. I need to start studying because the tests look pretty damn hard. I have to take 3 tests, they’re 4 hours each and $105. I don’t want to fail and retake one. I’ll probably start taking them at the end of the year. The testing period ends in December, so I really hope I can finish them all before then.  Hank has to be big enough where he can go 4 hours without nursing. He does that sometimes now but it’s hit or miss. Plus I’m not ready to leave my baby for that long, so end of the year it is.

-We took a mini vacation last weekend. We drove a whole 15 minutes away to our first destination and a whopping 30 minutes to the next! We planned on going to NW Arkansas, but I’m glad we decided not to last minute, seeing as it stormed like crazy and there was some pretty serious flooding between here and there. It was really good to clear our head space and just enjoy being a family. Bruce was coming off working for 2 weeks straight, we really needed it.

-We grilled out memorial day weekend and last weekend when we got back into town. We’re back on a poor mans budget and I am having steak withdrawls.

I’m going to go ahead and start that tumblr commune now. Please join me so I don’t die of lonliness. Only prerequisite is you have common sense and don’t try to talk to me before 9am.

In other news, Bruce is applying to be a firefighter and just the thought of having to go to sleep without him every couple days is giving me anxiety. I don’t mind the burning buildings, but don’t leave me alone at night. Waaaah.

My child has his Blue Steel look perfected.

I’m on my second period of the month. I’m basically a massive ball of rage and tears. Ugh. I wish I could leave myself alone.

It’s just one of those things that I feel deep down in my bones. I don’t have to know someone very well to know if they’re significant other is right for them, if they’re really happy or if it’s going to last. That might come off as if I’m full of myself and I know everything, but I’m not trying to be. Some people understand the weather or know what everyone else is thinking. I can’t do that, I just get relationships. I would never tell people what vibes their relationship is giving off, you can’t tell someone they’re with the wrong partner (and you look like a giant asshole if you’re wrong), and sometimes that is hard. It’s hard seeing someone unhappy when they might not even know it themselves. 

This post was brought on when I discovered an old co-workers facebook page. She had been with her boyfriend for probably 10 years. She was a yoga instructor and doula, and her vibe was so wonky and off to me. I only met her boyfriend a handful of times and knew something was just off there. Anyways, they apparently broke up and she looks happy. Really happy. It made me smile. I hate seeing people pretend.

I feel like I haven’t talked about them in awhile. So, here goes.

Hank: He turned 6 months on the 11th. He is always happy, has finally decided to nap for atleast an hour a day, rolls everywhere, cries when I eat or shower. We still aren’t giving him solids, I think I’ll wait until he is 7 months to try. He just seems so sensitive. I don’t know why exactly, I know his skin is sensitive, but something in his soul just seems so pure and I don’t want to disturb that. We selectively vaccinated Penny and I can’t bring myself to give Hank any shots. Luckily our doctor is amazing, he doesn’t say word about it and tells us how perfect he is. So I feel really good parenting this little boy. I feel very tuned into his needs, and he seems to be thriving. 

Penelope: Oh, my girl. She will be 4 at the end of September and I can’t believe it. She’s huge. Her feet and her mind are growing like crazy. She plays elaborate games every day which require you to give her your full attention and concentration. She loves drawing, loves writing letters and spelling words. She has to sing when she goes potty (long story-she had a bladder infection and I told her singing helps you pee-so now she sings every time because it ‘makes her go’). She is always wanting to learn about everything- it’s exhausting and thrilling all at once. She is so sweet at times, and then a little toot. After beating around the bush, we finally made a decision at the end of last year to homeschool her. There are a ton of reasons why we decided this, but when it came down to if we should do it or not, we looked and her and saw how well she was thriving. We saw how much attention she requires, how much she already knows, and realized it probably be a set back to put her in school. I fear she would get bored and dislike learning. She needs to be challenged and she really needs more one-on-one attention, that our public schools can’t offer. So we are jumping into that soon. We’ve been ‘teaching’ her at home for awhile, but actually making that commitment is both terrifying and exciting. Here’s to hoping we don’t screw her up (but who are we kidding, I’m sure the damage is already done).

So yeah. All in all, everything is good. The house is clean. My mind isn’t so fuzzy anymore (I finally got my period. It showed up 2.5 weeks late, what an asshole). I’m starting projects and ACTUALLY WORKING ON THEM. Feels good.